Insights into the Narrow Road

Autobiography in Five Short Chapters

Chapter 1

I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.I fall in.I am lost ... I am helpless.It isn't my fault.It takes forever to find a way out.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don't see it.
I fall in again.
I can't believe I am in the same place.
But it isn't my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in ... it's a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

Chapter 2

I walk down the same street.

Chapter 3

I walk down the same street.

Chapter 4

I walk down the same street.

Chapter 5

I walk down another street.

The road of life is full of twists and turns, potholes and roadblocks. Even at the age of only 24 I feel as if I have witnessed and experienced my share of obstacles, and much of our happiness (or unhappiness) is a direct result of the choices we make. There are always roads not taken, but only one chosen reality. As I get older (and hopefully wiser) I'm learning that above all else it is important to look around and recognize where I am right now. I ask how did I get here? Do I like it here? Understanding where I am allows me to make better decisions on how to proceed with my life. Sometimes it's not clear which route is best, but with reflection, meditation, intuition and intellect I find I am able to more clearly see my full range of possibilities and make the choice that will yield the results I desire. The more I practice the more I understand that it is extremely important that I make the decision that is best for me. Choosing a route to appease, please, or protect others usually leads to dissatisfaction, frustration and resentment on my part. Little by little I am learning to let go of my own doubt and guilt and make the choices that I truly need. Even though it still feels selfish at times, it is far better than sacrificing my own authenticity to the people around me. Ultimately the people who truly love me are still there for me, and that's all that really matters anyway.

I first read the poem above in The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying (a book I recommend highly for people of all faiths and backgrounds who wish to explore a path of spiritual enlightenment and inner peace). As I reflect on it now (a few months after my initial impression of it) I find myself staring blankly at Chapter 5. I have, I hope, learned to avoid the deep holes more quickly and more willingly...but I don't always see the other street to walk down. How do I know it when I see it? Often we travel the well worn path. The path that many others before us have traveled. This makes travel easy and efficient. The course is designed for us in much the same way our Interstates connect us from point A to point B with smooth (well mostly) four-lane roads and neatly plotted out exits. If we see our journey through life in this way then we start to believe that the potholes and speed traps that are caused by overuse and overcrowding are unavoidable situations that we simply must deal with in order to reach our destination quickly. The focus becomes sidestepping the hole in the sidewalk, rather than avoiding that street altogether. The stress and anxiety that we feel because of it also begin to feel unavoidable and we start to feel trapped...But what if we decided to stop rushing and start questioning? What if we took the blue highways instead? 

Imagine all the small towns and twists and turns, the sights you'll see if you let off the gas pedal and cruise at 55mph instead of 70mph. True, you'll get there more slowly. You may get lost. You may not like where you end up. BUT, You may also find something you didn't know you were looking for. You may meet interesting people and see odd things. You may discover that the world is still quite beautiful and full of kind, generous, friendly people. The possibilities on the blue highways become endless, there are no predetermined "exits." Like a network of veins and arteries scattered across the land, the narrow highways can carry you to smallest country towns or to the largest, bustling cities and in the meantime provide your soul with the life blood it needs: i.e. meaningful experience. Not meaningful in terms of what a city planner thought was important, but meaningful in a way that is important to you. Now imagine getting out of your car and riding your bicycle, how many paths are open to you now? Narrow alleys, gravel paths, woodland trails...all the places cars can't go now become viable options for you. Finally, imagine slowing down even more and usin your feet...how many routes could you take to get from A to B if you decide to walk everywhere you go? The possibilities become endless (why do you think Jesus, Ghandi, Buddha...etc. all walked everywhere???). That is what freedom looks like. Taking matters into your own hands and truly exploring all of your options. It's not always easy to see them, but with time and practice I have found that it can be done and that the results are worth while. 

¹³ Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. ¹⁴ But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it. (Matthew 7)

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Not all blue highways are literally blue. Some are not even paved.